Tuesday, September 25, 2007

Signature moves

OK, so this season's Bachelor is looking to be a roaring success. The highlight from last night was...well, a bit of background for you non-Bachelor watching weridos ;)

The Bachelor meets 25 girlies on the first night ("25 BEAUTFIUL ladies!"). They party all night and at sunrise he eliminates 10 of them (by not offering them a rose) and keeps the other 15 for future fun. A couple seasons ago they introduced the "first impression rose", to be given to whoever the Bachelor really LIKE likes that first evening. Everyone wants the first impression rose, even though there has been no correlation btwn receiving it and "winning".

So last night the heat was on to get the first impression rose, as always. The camera panned to two girls sitting together. One of them announced that, as part of her effort to get The Rose it was time for her "signature move". Are you ready for this? When the Bachelor came over she kicked off her heels and showed him her webbed toes. Most girls try to show off thier talents (usually painful to watch or hear), or thier raw sex appeal. But this misguided soul busts out with her webbed feet. You can't make this shit up! Camera cut to the Bachelor, reliving the moment after the party, and the poor guy could barely talk he was laughing so hard. By the end he actually had tears he was wiping away! We made our third call of the evening to Jenna (who was not by her phone, most annoyingly), and Robert gasped out the tale to her voice mail between bouts of laughter. Where do they find these people?? How can having webbed toes be a "signature move", and who on earth would find that so blindingly attractive that it would catapult you over the ranks of 24 other girlies?

This girl needs some help. If she hung out with me I could show her MY signature move: fitting my mouth around a Coke can. Or my fist. Or stuffing it full of 43 grapes.

Yeah, some folks got the class and the REAL moves, and some don't. That's all I'm sayin'.

3 comments:

Jo said...

this post was hysterical!!! Thanks!

the main stitch upholstery said...

nice jovi! does it have to be a coke can? how about coors light? that would be more impressive to mike..................

Unknown said...

it was HILARIOUS...but I thought her "sig move" was the finger thing with the eyes...she did it as she exited the limo and while sitting on the couch. Really, though, I don't know which is worse, the finger move or showing off the toes.

the bach was so funny trying to talk about it.

how 'bout Pretzel girl. Is that suppose to be attractive? UGH. Somethings you should just keep to yourself.